Little Things of Love

Everyone knows that once you get married your romancing changes. We are no exception. Ryan spoiled me like a princess when we were dating, but now I'm lucky to get Wal-Mart flowers on a special occasion. This doesn't mean that he doesn't show his love for me. On the contrary, every single day all the little things he does tells me how much he loves me.

Fancey dinners, spontanious outings somewhere special, big beautiful flowers for no reason, these things are gone. It's okay, the sentiment is different when it's both of your money he's spending to give these elaborite gifts or outings. Ryan his so exhausted when he comes home from work that he rarely even has time to think about what I would call romance.

So how do I get that warm fuzzy loving feeling from him every day?

• He leaves me some milk. That sounds silly, but when the milk is almost gone and only enough for one he will leave me enough for breakfast.



• He emptys the dishwasher. I try to make sure to get the dishes done every day. He just took over the responsability of emptying it right after dinner and loading the dinner dishes.



• He makes dinner. I am often feeding the baby right before dinner. Instead of waiting for me to finish he gets right in there and makes dinner, I join him when I'm finished with Jaden.



• He changes diapers. I love it when he changes the baby's diaper without being asked. He hates doing so it means a lot.



• He plays with the baby. On Jaden's whiney days I am so done entertaining him by the time Ryan gets home. Even though he is very tired and just wants to veg for a bit he'll take Jaden for a bit so I can have a much needed break.



• He gets water for me. Even though I am fully capable of getting my own beverage I love it when Ryan does it for me as he often does. He knows when I feed Jaden I get thirsty and will bring me water without asking, and at night he gets me a glass of water for my bedside table.



• He thinks I'm beautiful. It's not just that he tells me I am beautiful, though he does. It's that he really means it. I can see it when he looks at me. This means so much since at 24 I have already lost my prime body I enjoyed in high school and college and have given into the fact that I will never truly have it back. Ryan doesn't care. He thought I was beautiful then, he thought I was beautiful when I was pregnant and he thinks I'm beautiful now, stretch marks and all.

There are so many more little things he does all the time to show he loves me, but I think you have the idea. Grand gestures are fine for courting, but we are now one and as one what we need is more important than what we want. What we need is eachother. Just his existing in my world is love and comfort to me.

I'd like to say I'm as good as he is at showing love in the little selfless things, but to be honest I am more selfish than he is. I'm reminded of an episode of Malcom in the Middle where the parents are just winding down a fight and Lois says "but that means you love me more than I love you." He smiles sweetly. "Of course I do. I always have." I think it's the sweetest thing, maybe because that's how it is with us. Maybe Ryan does love me more than I love him, but I love him and my son more than anything else on Earth and he knows that. I will always be in his shadow of selflessness as I can never equal up, but it's okay because I try and he knows that. He loves me for who I am, selfish, lazy and all. I love him more every day. He's more romantic than he'll ever know.